ç'est la vie RN

Category: The journey

  • Fresh or Spoiled? Checking the Soil of the Heart

    Fresh or Spoiled? Checking the Soil of the Heart

    For the past three weeks, my refrigerator has not been cooling properly. At first, I didn’t think much of it. I placed food inside, trusting it would stay fresh, only to find it spoiled quicker than usual. What was meant to preserve and nourish had become a place of waste. The fridge sounded and looked like it was doing its job from the outside, but inside, it was no longer the right environment for keeping things good. I had a new fridge delivered yesterday. As I thought about this, God reminded me that our hearts can be the same way. We can look fine on the outside, but if the soil of our hearts is not right, what goes in may not remain fresh. God’s Word, His truth, and even His blessings can sit in a heart that is too distracted, too hardened, or too weary to let them grow. Instead of producing life, they become crowded out and wasted.

    Jesus said, “But the seed falling on good soil refers to someone who hears the word and understands it. This is the one who produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown” (Matthew 13:23, NIV).

    The condition of the soil matters. It determines whether the Word will take root or fade away.

    Scripture urges us: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Proverbs 4:23, NIV). Just like I need to be intentional about keeping my refrigerator working properly so that what I consume doesn’t make me ill, I must also be intentional about tending the soil of my heart. What am I letting in? What am I feeding on—fear or faith, bitterness or forgiveness, noise or God’s still small voice? What is manifesting from it? When the soil is healthy, the fruit becomes undeniable. Paul reminds us, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5:22–23, NIV). These fruits don’t grow because of striving; they grow because the heart is resting in the right environment. They are the result of an environment that is softened by prayer, nourished by Scripture, and watered by the Spirit.

    So today, I invite you to pause and reflect: What is the soil of your heart like? Is it ready to receive the living Word of God? Or does it need some tending, some clearing away of clutter, some refreshing by His Spirit? Ask the Lord to prepare your heart so that His Word can grow deep roots. Invite Him to cultivate your soil, so that what comes out of your life is not spoiled or wasted, but fresh, nourishing, and filled with the fruit of His Spirit. May we each become good soil; ready to receive, ready to grow, and ready to bear fruit that blesses the world around us.

    Prayer:
    Lord, soften the soil of my heart. Remove what doesn’t belong and make me ready to receive Your Word with joy. Water me with Your Spirit, so that I may grow in love, peace, and faithfulness. Let my life bear fruit that reflects Your goodness and draws others to You.     Amen.

  • The Weight We Carry

    The Weight We Carry

    Leadership, love, and the invisible load

    For the past two months, life has felt… weighty. There’s a kind of weight we carry that isn’t measured in pounds or seen in the mirror—it’s emotional, mental, and often spiritual. It’s the kind of heaviness that wakes you up at 3 a.m., lingers through quiet moments, and hides behind busy schedules. For those in leadership—especially servant leaders grounded in faith—this weight often extends beyond personal trials. It includes the burdens we carry for others and the impact of our own decisions.

    As a nurse leader and someone deeply invested in people’s wellbeing, I’ve learned that the heaviness I feel isn’t always about what’s happening to me. Sometimes it’s what I’ve done—or failed to do—that weighs most. The ripple effects of decisions, the expectations of those who look to me, and the unspoken pain I witness in others—all of it accumulates like invisible bricks in a backpack no one sees.

    This burden isn’t unfamiliar to Scripture. In Galatians 6:2, Paul urges us, “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” Leadership is inherently a burden-bearing role. We are called to stand in the gap, to intercede, to advocate, and often to feel deeply. But it’s easy to confuse this noble call with the belief that we must carry everything alone.

    In Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus speaks to this precise tension:
    “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest… For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

    He did not say life or leadership will be weightless—but He offers to share the yoke. There’s divine partnership available when we choose not to carry the invisible load alone.

    Some days the heaviness comes from watching others struggle—team members facing burnout, friends losing loved ones, patients caught in systems beyond our control. Romans 12:15 reminds us to “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.” Empathy is holy work, but it has a cost. It adds to the weight.

    So what do we do with this kind of heaviness?

    We bring it to the One who understands leadership, grief, and love more than we ever will. We ask God for wisdom to know what is ours to carry and what we must release. And we learn to embrace both compassion and boundaries—grace for ourselves, grace for others.

    Reflection:
    If your soul feels heavy today, pause. Ask: Is this weight mine? Is it someone else’s? Have I offered it to God? Leadership may require us to hold much, but it never requires us to hold it alone.

    Scripture References (NIV):

    • Galatians 6:2
    • Matthew 11:28-30
    • Romans 12:15

    Call to Action:
    Take five minutes today to journal or pray: “Lord, what am I carrying that I need to surrender to You?” And then—release it. Even just a little. One prayer at a time.

  • When the Invisible Becomes Visible

    When the Invisible Becomes Visible

    Every spring, my friend Lisa and I visit the Dallas Arboretum. I found myself so enamored with the experience that I neglected to take photos. There is a sacred presence as you wander about the many paths. The air is light with the scent of new blooms. The towering magnolia trees make my heart smile with nostalgic thoughts of home. Sunlight dances on the surface of White Rock Lake. Tulips stretch upward like praise hands. Everything feels alive, purposeful, and in full declaration of the One who made it all.

    Romans 1:20 says, “For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made…” As I walked through rows of vibrant flowers and magnificent trees, I was struck by how clearly God’s creativity, order, and majesty were on display. Nature doesn’t argue about God—it just reveals Him.

    And then I wondered, “What would people say about me if my invisible attributes were clearly seen?”

    If my thoughts, intentions, and character were laid bare like the petals of a spring bloom—would they reflect the One who made me? Would people sense grace, patience, and love? Or would they find worry, bitterness, or pride tucked beneath the surface?

    Here’s the beautiful truth: Just as spring renews the earth, God is always ready to renew us. We aren’t stuck with the things we hide. The Holy Spirit works quietly but powerfully, reshaping our inner lives so that who we are in private begins to shine in public.

    You don’t have to be perfect. But you can be intentional.

    • Pause and notice God in creation.
    • Let Him speak to your soul in quiet places.
    • Ask Him to make your inner world as beautiful as the world He made outside.

    If the trees can point to His glory, so can we.

    Call to Action:

    Take a quiet walk this week—at your local arboretum, a park, or even just around your neighborhood. As you notice creation, ask God to show you one invisible attribute He wants to grow in you. Write it down. Pray into it. Let that inner transformation begin today.

    “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” —Psalm 51:10

  • Reflection: Growing in Christ

    Reflection: Growing in Christ

    Yesterday, was Resurrection Sunday. After church service, I spent some time reflecting on my walk with the Lord. Growing in my relationship with Christ has been a journey filled with grace, correction, love, and transformation. In my early walk—what they call “a babe in Christ”—I relied heavily on others to feed me spiritually. I was open to the warmth of His presence but had little understanding of His Word. My prayers were often simple and self-focused, like a child asking for what they want without fully grasping the love or authority of the One they were speaking to.

    As I’ve grown, my hunger for deeper understanding has increased. I now recognize the importance of obedience, trust, and surrender. I’ve learned that following Christ is not just about feelings but about faith—walking even when I don’t feel Him, believing even when I don’t understand. I see more clearly the areas of my life where He is calling me higher—into holiness, humility, and genuine love for others.

    Still, there is a long way to go. There are places in my heart that need refining, thoughts that need to be taken captive, and habits that must be surrendered. Living a righteous life is not about perfection, but about direction—constantly moving toward Christ, even when I stumble. His grace covers me, but His Spirit also empowers me to grow. The journey never truly ends.

    All of this growth is only possible because of what Jesus did on the cross. I think back to being a little girl in church where they would sing songs like Jesus Paid it All, There is a Fountain, and my favorite hymn, Near the Cross. I now understand the gravity of salvation. He bore my sins, past and future, and gave me access to the Father. He didn’t die so I could live a good life—He died so I could live a new life. His resurrection power is what enables me to mature, to be transformed day by day into His image. The wonder of His love, proven through His sacrifice, draws me closer and inspires me to live a life that honors Him.

    3 Simple Ways You Can Grow Closer to the Lord Today:

    1. Talk to God Throughout Your Day
      Prayer doesn’t always have to be long or formal. Whisper to Him in your car, thank Him while cooking, or ask for guidance in a moment of stress. Make Him your constant companion.
    2. Spend Time in the Word Daily
      Even if it’s just one chapter or a few verses, let God speak to your heart through Scripture. His Word is living and will guide your thoughts and actions.
    3. Show Love Intentionally
      Look for simple ways to love others—through kindness, listening, encouraging words, or acts of service. Loving people well is one of the clearest signs of a deepening relationship with Christ.

  • Never Would Have Made It

    Never Would Have Made It

    Do you ever feel like December just insists on snowballing itself into the new year? I finally made time this weekend to sit and reflect about the 4th quarter and all the things. Never would have made it without you Lord! The sentiment resonates deeply with overcoming life’s trials through faith, perseverance, and the support of all my tribes. Whether it be in the nursing profession, ministry work, or in personal struggles, there are moments I realize that I didn’t make it on my own. “If the Lord had not been on our side…the flood would have engulfed us, the torrent would have swept over us” (Psalm 124:2,4).

    These words are a reminder that every victory, every step forward, is evidence of God’s faithfulness! The truth is none of us could have made it alone. But through His grace, and often through the people He places around us, we stand as testimonies of His unfailing love and power. As we look back, we give thanks. We lean on the same God who brought us through. We never would have made it…but God! Giving God the glory after a hard time is not just about gratitude—it’s about acknowledging His sovereignty and His hand in the process. It’s saying, “God, I couldn’t have done this without You.” As 2 Corinthians 12:9 reminds us, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

    After almost 8 months without a job…I never experienced homelessness or hunger. All the bills got paid. I was granted the opportunity to continue fellowship with friends, grow in the Spirit, get back to singing, and simply have joy in the valley. When we glorify God after a trial, we testify to His faithfulness and inspire others to trust Him in their own storms. He is trustworthy! Keep trusting and believing Him for whatever desires He has planted in your heart. In the end, I realized my struggle was about revealing His power and His glory through my life. To God be the glory, great things He has done!

  • Embracing the Generational Shift

    Embracing the Generational Shift

    Last week, my great-great uncle passed. He was the last of a generation. Suddenly, it occurred to me that I am on the path to becoming “the older people”. Don’t get me wrong, it is a blessing to wake up every morning! There is also the realization that the number of days behind me, likely exceed the number of days ahead. Middle adulthood is a phase of life marked by responsibility, wisdom, and the opportunity to influence future generations. Being the adults of this generation, in this culture, means navigating challenges unique to our time while anchoring ourselves in timeless biblical truths. As we grow older, our roles as stewards of God’s blessings, mentors to the younger generation, and servants in His kingdom become more pronounced. What does Scripture say about this sacred responsibility?

    1. Living as God’s Stewards

    Adulthood calls us to steward the resources, talents, and relationships God has entrusted to us. Whether it’s our time, finances, or spiritual gifts, we are accountable for using them wisely for His glory.

    In 1 Corinthians 4:2, Paul reminds us:
    “Now it is required that those who have been given a trust must prove faithful.”

    Faithfulness in stewardship means making decisions that honor God and benefit others. This includes providing for our families, investing in our communities, and being diligent in our work.

    2. Leading the Next Generation

    One of our primary responsibilities as adults is to guide and mentor the younger generation. In a world filled with competing values, they need godly examples who live out biblical principles with integrity.

    Psalm 78:4 emphasizes the importance of this role:
    “We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, His power, and the wonders He has done.”

    As adults, we are called to teach the next generation about God’s faithfulness, equipping them to navigate life’s challenges with wisdom and faith.

    3. Pursuing Wisdom and Growth

    Adulthood is not the end of personal growth—it’s a time to deepen our relationship with God and mature in character. Proverbs 16:31 says:
    “Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness.”

    This verse reminds us that growing older is a gift, not a burden. It’s an opportunity to gain wisdom and use it to guide others, reflecting God’s glory in our lives.

    4. Serving in the Kingdom of God

    As adults, our maturity equips us to serve in unique and impactful ways. Whether through leadership, discipleship, or acts of service, our lives should be a reflection of Christ’s love.

    In 1 Peter 4:10-11, we are encouraged:
    “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.”

    Adulthood is a season to step into God’s purposes with boldness, embracing the privilege of being His hands and feet in a broken world.

    Walking in Purpose

    Becoming the adults of this generation means more than simply growing older—it’s about growing in purpose. It’s about living as Christ’s ambassadors (2 Corinthians 5:20), taking on the mantle of responsibility with grace, and leaving a legacy that points others to Him.

    Let us rise to this calling, knowing that our work is not in vain when done in the Lord (1 Corinthians 15:58). May we embrace the responsibilities and opportunities of adulthood with faith, wisdom, and a heart for service.

  • Analysis paralysis

    Analysis paralysis

    I’m going to keep this short and sweet tonight. Last went pretty well. It ended with some unsolicited feedback from someone I trust and consider a friend about how I over analyze things. It’s true. What this person is not aware of is that I have been trying to improve my leadership presence, and there are projects I have stewing on my back burner. In the process of learning and trying to decide what photos to use, which applications to use, how to insert the forms from one service into another, my mind kept telling me not to publish my landing page until the aesthetic was how I desired and functional. I’m taking this course and the coach has said repeatedly, just put something out there.

    Inherently, I am a planner. I try to consider all the scenarios. I honestly thought I had grown out of my perfectionist stage. This morning, I tuned into Coffee with Chrystal (The Sister Circle Inner Circle) on YouTube about midway through the chat. It was literally a few minutes before she played a video. This guy is walking and tells a short story (he did not remember the original creator) about how a smart person will spend six months planning a project and someone opposite will just start trying stuff until something eventually works…and even if it doesn’t work, they now have that amount of practical knowledge they can apply to the next thing. “Analysis paralysis” he termed it. I felt sooooo naked and ashamed.

    And so, I decided to push publish today. I can add to it, change themes, add pages and redirect how my heart sees fit. It’s time to do instead of planning to do, letting my dreams become overdue. My landing page has taken flight, AND still is in progress. : )

    Have a great week!

  • I’m still here…

    I’m still here…

    I have been busy with all the things! Times like this, I consider being single, and childless a joy, because I cannot imagine adding anything else to the mixing bowl of my life and still being able to bake a great cake. Pursuing this doctoral degree is an incredible journey and an overwhelming challenge all at once. I started a class in mid-October, and the first week of that class, school completely disappeared from my radar. I missed an assignment that is 13% of my final grade. The class is halfway done and right now, I’m hanging out at a pathetic 64% with one assignment grade pending. If you know me in real life, you already know how I feel about that. Balancing responsibilities, keeping the vision alive, and pushing through can seem daunting. Yet, the Bible reminds us that we are “more than conquerors through him who loved us” (Romans 8:37). Here are three ways to stay focused and keep moving forward as an overcomer.

    1. **Set Clear, Faith-Driven Goals** 

    Go to God first! Ground yourself in prayer and scripture to set goals that align with God’s purpose for you. One of my favorite scriptures is Proverbs 16:3, “Commit your works to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” Each step in the journey becomes meaningful and fruitful when rooted in faith and purpose.

    Photo by Jessica Lewis ud83eudd8b thepaintedsquare on Pexels.com

    2. **Develop a Routine that Prioritizes Balance** 

    Create a structured yet flexible routine that incorporates study, rest, and spiritual renewal. I will admit, I am not great at the structured routine part but improving. Balancing time with God, your studies, and self-care will help sustain you through the challenges. Jesus, throughout His ministry, “often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16), showing us the importance of rest and renewal.

    3. **Seek Support from a Faith Community** 

    Having a support network can be invaluable. You will notice that your tribe changes throughout the different phases of your life, and that’s OK! The key is to surround yourself with people who encourage and uplift you in prayer and fellowship. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 tells us that “two are better than one… if either of them falls down, one can help the other up.”

    Dinner with some of my nurse leader tribe at G.W. Fins in New Orleans during the ANCC Magnet/Pathways Conference

    Staying focused is a journey of persistence and faith. Remember, you’re not alone, and with God’s strength, you are an overcomer, ready to fulfill the purpose He’s set before you!

    Have a great rest of your week!

  • Biblical discipleship:

    Biblical discipleship:

    Walking daily with Christ in a distracting world

    I would say I can’t believe I haven’t written in three weeks, but some of my paper journals have multiple month gaps. Well, in this gap, I am being enriched by our current sermon series, Disciples Unleashed. Discipleship, at its core, is about pursuing Jesus and growing in our relationship with Him. In today’s fast-paced world, distractions abound, pulling us away from a life of genuine discipleship. Still, God calls us to a higher way—a commitment to walk in obedience and surrender to His will.

    The Call to Follow Christ

    Jesus’ invitation to discipleship is simple but profound: “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men” (Matthew 4:19, KJV). Being a disciple of Christ means leaving behind our old ways, stepping away from self-centered living, and pursuing His will. It’s not just a one-time decision but a daily commitment to live as He did. Believers often forget, Christ faced constant opposition. Similar that the world around us, with its allurements, demands our time, attention, and heart. We are called to resist this pull and stay anchored in Christ, just as Paul exhorted the early believers: “Be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2, KJV). Conformity to the world leads to compromise, but transformation through the Spirit leads to Christlikeness.

    The World’s Pull: Distractions and Temptations

    Jesus warned us about the dangers of the world’s distractions in His parable of the sower: “He also that received seed among the thorns is he that heareth the word; and the care of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches, choke the word, and he becometh unfruitful” (Matthew 13:22, KJV). Many things compete for our devotion—careers, entertainment, material wealth—but when these take precedence over our relationship with God, we become spiritually unfruitful. The world offers immediate gratification and comfort, while discipleship often requires self-denial. Jesus said, “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me” (Luke 9:23, KJV). This self-denial goes against the grain of our culture, which promotes self-fulfillment at all costs.

    Staying Focused on Christ

    So, how do we maintain our focus on Christ in a world full of distractions?

    1. Abide in His Word 

    • This is a constant work in progress for me, Jesus said, “If ye continue in my word, then are ye my disciples indeed” (John 8:31, KJV). Regular study of Scripture keeps us grounded and nourished spiritually. As we meditate on God’s Word, we are reminded of His promises, His character, and His instructions for living as His followers.

    2. Cultivate a Prayer Life 

    • Prayer is the lifeline of a disciple. Jesus Himself modeled a life of prayer, often withdrawing to be alone with the Father (Luke 5:16, KJV). Create for yourself a sacred space. Through prayer, we remain connected to the source of our strength and direction.

    3. Fellowship with Other Believers 

    • Being part of a community of believers encourages us to grow and stay accountable. This has been a huge transition for me, as I am naturally a person that loves quiet and stillness. The Lord intended for us to live in community. Hebrews 10:24-25 (KJV) reminds us: “And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works: not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together… but exhorting one another.” If this part of your life is lacking, I would encourage you to pray and ask the Lord to bring the people you need into your life.

    4. Resist the World’s Influence 

    • James 4:4 (KJV) gives us a clear warning: “Know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God?” We must guard our hearts against the subtle influences that draw us away from God’s truth. By focusing on Christ, we can live in the world without being of it.

    True discipleship is about walking with Jesus every day, learning from Him, and becoming more like Him. While the world may pull us in different directions, God’s Word remains a firm foundation. Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6, KJV), and as His disciples, we are called to follow Him wholeheartedly, resisting the world’s pull and staying anchored in His truth. Let us choose Christ daily by taking up our cross, denying ourselves, and walking in the path of true discipleship.

  • He’s in the room

    He’s in the room

    I’ve been running around like crazy the past two days, but I had to come share a quick story about yesterday. The day started with me getting up super early to have an expectations conversation with a pair of feuding nurses. I wasn’t ridiculously concerned about having the conversation, but the energy required to counteract negativity can be mentally draining. After I completed that task, I proceeded to my office. About two hours later, one of the pharmacy techs was passing by. We exchanged morning greetings, and a few seconds later she reappeared at my door. She said, “Jesus told me to tell you He loves you.” She said initially she was going to keep walking, but it hit her spirit so heavy she knew she couldn’t. Not even two hours later, one of the nurses asked if we could chat. I invited her into my office, and we went through her checklist of items. She begins to tell me how there is a change in the atmosphere with my presence and says, “You must have brought Jesus in here with you.”

    Later that afternoon, another nurse came to visit me. We discussed a number of things for about fifteen minutes and before she leaves, she closes the door and says, “I wanna tell you something.” She continues to tell me how I am doing a great job, and she feels I was sent there specifically for that staff…I got chills. It’s confirmation that…1) I am clear about my purpose. 2) I was anointed before I was appointed. 3) The Lord is with me! It gives me confidence and certainty of victory that is to come. How gracious of God to send blessed assurance in such an unexpected way! I may have not overtly felt the Lord’s presence for myself yesterday, but He made sure I KNEW He was there. And knowing so, gives me such joy!

    Psalm 16:11 speaks of the deep joy and fulfillment found in God’s presence. The passage highlights that true life and satisfaction come from walking with God. It points to the eternal joy and pleasure that can only be experienced in communion with Him, both in this life and for eternity. It reminds believers that God’s guidance leads to lasting peace and joy that surpasses anything the world offers. Do you have joy or do you need a closer with Thee?