ç'est la vie RN

Category: The journey

The Biggest Betrayal

This past Tuesday, I attended an intimate networking event for healthcare executives. It was the kind of gathering where people could speak openly, wrestle with complex ideas, and share lessons they had learned through leadership and life. Every space is not a safe space, so I appreciated the privacy of the conversation. As I reflected on the evening, one comment continued to linger with me. An executive shared that when he is considering a decision, he asks himself a question:

“Would doing this be a betrayal of myself?”

Whew.

That was deep.

It made me think about the decisions we make when no one else is watching. The opportunities we accept. The conversations we entertain. The boundaries we ignore. The convictions we silence. The ways we sometimes shrink, perform, compromise, or settle because doing so feels easier in the moment.

But as believers, the question goes even deeper. We do not belong only to ourselves. Our identity is rooted in Christ. So perhaps the question is not simply, would this decision betray me? We must also ask:

“Would this decision betray who I am in Christ?”

When Our Desires Become Disconnected

Sometimes we approach decisions as though our desires and God’s desires exist in two separate spaces.

I want what I want.

God wants what He wants.

And somehow, we convince ourselves that the two do not have to meet. We may pray for God’s direction while secretly hoping He will approve the direction we have already chosen. We may ask for wisdom while leaning heavily on our own understanding. We may know what aligns with our values, yet make the opposite choice because it promises comfort, recognition, companionship, advancement, or immediate relief. Proverbs 3:5–6 reminds us:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” — Proverbs 3:5–6, NIV

Notice the phrase “in all your ways.”

Not only in church.

Not only when the decision feels spiritual.

Not only when the consequences are obvious.

Our faith is not an accessory that we put on when it complements our plans. Our identity in Christ is meant to influence how we lead, work, speak, love, respond, and choose.

Paul writes, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me” (Galatians 2:20, NIV).

That does not mean we lose our personalities, ambitions, dreams, or individuality. It means those things are surrendered to something greater. Our lives are no longer guided solely by what feels good, looks successful, or satisfies us temporarily. Our decisions should increasingly reflect the character of the One who lives within us.

Peter Knew What Betrayal Felt Like

Remember when Peter boldly declared that he would never abandon Jesus. Yet when pressure came, he denied even knowing Him—not once, but three times. Peter’s words in that courtyard contradicted everything he had previously professed. Fear caused him to behave in a way that betrayed both his relationship with Jesus and the person he believed himself to be.

Then the rooster crowed.

That sound forced Peter to confront the distance between his confession and his conduct. Luke tells us that Peter went outside and wept bitterly (Luke 22:54–62). Many of us have experienced our own rooster-crowing moments; the conversation ends, the relationship falls apart, the opportunity passes, or the emotional fog lifts. Suddenly, we recognize that the choice we made did not reflect our values, our calling, or our identity in Christ.

We wonder…How did I get here? Why did I agree to that? Why did I ignore what I knew? Why did I allow fear, pride, loneliness, anger, or ambition make the decision for me?

Praise the Lord for His faithfulness, because Peter’s story did not end with his betrayal.

Jesus restored him.

In John 21, Jesus met Peter again—not to humiliate him, but to recommission him. Peter’s failure was real, but it was not final. Jesus allowed him to acknowledge his love, reclaim his purpose, and move forward with greater humility. That is good news for us too!

Pause Before You Proceed

Living in alignment with Christ requires good intentions and awareness. Romans 12:2 instructs us not to conform to the patterns of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. That transformation affects how we evaluate our choices. It teaches us to pause before responding, agreeing, pursuing, or walking away.

Before making a decision, we can ask:

Does this choice reflect the character of Christ?

Am I acting from faith or from fear?

Will this require me to silence a conviction, compromise a value, or become someone I do not recognize?

Am I seeking God’s direction, or merely asking Him to bless my preference?

Not every difficult decision is wrong, and not every uncomfortable path is a betrayal of ourselves. Sometimes obedience requires us to leave what is familiar, disappoint others, establish boundaries, or surrender something we genuinely wanted.

The goal is not to protect every personal desire.

The goal is alignment.

When our identity is anchored in Christ, betraying who we are in Him becomes the biggest betrayal of all. Yet even when we fall short, grace invites us to recognize it, repent, receive restoration, and choose differently the next time.

Reflect…

When was the last time I made a decision that betrayed who I am in Christ?

What influenced that decision—fear, pride, pressure, loneliness, anger, ambition, or something else? Should a similar situation arise again, what would you do differently to ensure your choice reflects both your convictions and your identity in Christ?

Before your next yes, ask whether it requires you to betray your truest identity.

July 19, 2026
Disruptions Are Not Definitions

God’s Grace Is Greater Than Your History

My sister and I have a habit of wandering into deep conversations. We’ll start talking about something completely unrelated and somehow end up discussing the deep complexities of life. A simple question turns into an hour of unpacking experiences, perspectives, and the lessons God has been teaching us.

Recently, we found ourselves talking about the difference between responsibility and accountability. The discussion initially centered around individuals who hold on to the past and use it as a reason for why their life is in its current state. It’s always the parent who made them pursue a career I did not desire, or the ex who tore them to shreds before leaving the relationship. Some people will even accuse God of abandoning them in their greatest time of need as a valid reason for distrust.

To some, responsibility and accountability sound like same thing. We discussed what that looks like. If someone (regardless of intention) hands you a backpack full of bricks, you aren’t responsible for how heavy it is or who put them there. But once the backpack is on your shoulders, you become accountable for what you do next. You can continue carrying it everywhere, set it down, ask for help, or begin removing one brick at a time. The weight may not have been your fault, but your response becomes your responsibility, and the accountability of that response lies with you. In the same way, our past may explain what we’re carrying, but through Christ, we are accountable for how we choose to move forward.

Life happens to all of us. Some people grow up in loving homes where they are encouraged, protected, and affirmed. Others grow up learning to survive. Some experienced rejection before they ever experienced acceptance. Some learned to carry responsibilities that belonged to adults long before they were old enough to understand them. Others still carry the weight of abuse, abandonment, addiction, betrayal, or words that have shaped the way they see themselves for years.

Those experiences matter.

They leave fingerprints on our hearts. God is not asking us to pretend they never happened.

But there comes a point where responsibility changes hands. We may not be responsible for what happened yesterday. We are accountable for what we choose to do today. That’s a difficult truth because it removes one of the easiest places to hide. It’s far easier to point backward than it is to look inward. If we’re honest, many of us have done it…

“I eat this way because that’s how I was raised.”

“I struggle to trust because everyone I’ve loved has disappointed me.”

“I don’t pursue my relationship with Jesus because I’ve never felt worthy.”

“I can’t forgive because they never apologized.”

While those statements may explain our reality, they don’t have to determine our future. Somewhere along the way, our explanation quietly becomes our excuse. And when that happens, we stop living as though redemption is possible.

I love that Scripture never asks us to deny our pain.

David didn’t. Read the Psalms and you’ll find a man who cried, questioned, grieved, feared, and wrestled with God. He didn’t hide his emotions behind polished prayers. He poured out his heart. Yet David almost always ended in the same place…He remembered who God is.

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him…” (Psalm 42:11, NIV)

His circumstances didn’t always change immediately.

His perspective did.

Joseph is another great example.

Can you imagine the temptation to spend the rest of your life blaming your brothers? They betrayed him. They stripped him of his identity. They sold him into slavery and left him for dead in every way that mattered. Joseph could have spent years saying, “This is why my life turned out the way it did.”

Instead, after years of hardship, prison, and waiting, he looked at the very people who wounded him and said,

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done…” (Genesis 50:20, NIV)

Joseph didn’t rewrite history. He reinterpreted it through the faithfulness of God. His past explained him. It never excused him from becoming the man God had called him to be.

How about the woman at the well? By every human standard, she carried enough shame to keep her hidden forever. She had a complicated past and a reputation everyone knew. Yet Jesus never defined her by the chapters everyone else had already read. Instead, He invited her into a new story. One conversation with Jesus transformed her from someone hiding at a well into someone boldly telling an entire town about the Messiah (John 4).

That’s what grace does.

It doesn’t erase yesterday.

It redeems it.

How many of us are waiting for someone else to make things right before we’re willing to move forward?

We’re waiting on an apology.

Waiting for closure.

Waiting for someone to admit they were wrong.

Waiting for circumstances to change before we decide to change.

Healing rarely begins when someone else changes. Healing begins when we surrender our right to let yesterday dictate today. Paul reminds us,

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” (2 Corinthians 5:17, NIV)

Notice he doesn’t say the memories disappear. He says our identity changes. That’s the difference. My past is part of my story. It is not my identity.

Every morning, God offers us something remarkable!

Not a do-over.

Not amnesia.

Mercy!

“The LORD’S acts of mercy indeed do not end, For His compassions do not fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)

July 12, 2026
Powered, Not Perfect

North Texas has been unapologetically hot lately (and yes, I know we’re still pre-heating).

Not just hot, humid…which I should be used to being I’m a Southeastern Louisiana transplant. It’s the kind of humid that hangs in the air like a heavy blanket before the sun has even fully introduced itself. The air is thick and musty, as if you have to push your way through it just to breathe. It’s the kind of weather that makes you question every life decision that brought you outside.

A few weeks ago, I made a commitment to myself to spend more time moving outdoors. Nothing extravagant, just intentional time walking each morning before the day begins.

So there I was.

6:30 in the morning.

I figured I was beating the heat.

I was wrong.

Fifteen minutes into my walk, my shirt was soaked through. Sweat rolled down my face and arms as though I’d been exercising for hours instead of minutes. By the time I finished my first mile, every excuse I could think of sounded completely reasonable.

You’ve already walked a mile. That’s enough for today. Go home.

I was fully prepared to turn around. Before I did, a thought crossed my mind that stopped me in my tracks.

What if we served a God who gave up every time He got tired?

What if He stopped pursuing us every time we inconvenienced Him?

What if He withdrew His grace every time we chose disobedience?

What if His faithfulness depended on our consistency?

The answer is both obvious and sobering. We wouldn’t stand a chance! The reality is that we are infinitely farther from God’s standard than I was from finishing my walk. His holiness is absolute. His righteousness is perfect. Left to ourselves, we could never bridge that gap.

That is precisely why Christ came.

“But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8, NIV

Jesus didn’t wait until we became stronger, more disciplined, or more obedient. He met us in our weakness. As I continued walking, another realization settled into my heart. Sometimes I spend so much energy trying to become the kind of Christian God desires that I subtly begin believing it’s my responsibility to manufacture that transformation.

I try harder.

Pray longer.

Read more.

Convince myself I’m doing better.

While those disciplines matter, they were never meant to be the source of my strength. The Christian life isn’t sustained by determination. It’s sustained by dependence. The standard God calls us to isn’t something we can achieve through grit or self-discipline. If that were possible, the cross would have been unnecessary. Instead, God calls us to surrender—to allow His Spirit to accomplish in us what we could never accomplish on our own.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in Me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from Me you can do nothing.” John 15:5, NIV

Nothing.

Not “less.”

Not “a little.”

Nothing!

That word has a way of humbling every ambitious heart. The more I lean into my walk with Christ, the more I realize that spiritual maturity isn’t becoming increasingly independent. It’s becoming increasingly aware of just how much I need Him.

For every act of obedience…

For every ounce of patience…

For every difficult conversation…

For every temptation resisted…

For every opportunity to love someone who isn’t easy to love…

None of it is accomplished by my own strength. It is His power working through surrendered people. Ironically, I finished my walk that morning. Not because the weather suddenly changed. Not because I became stronger, but because I simply kept taking the next step. Maybe that’s what God is inviting us to do today.

Not to prove ourselves.

Not to perform.

Not to convince Him we’re worthy.

Just to stay connected to the One whose power never runs dry.

Because when our strength runs out, His never does.

July 5, 2026
Well in the Waiting

There is a unique kind of pressure that comes with waiting on God.

Not the casual waiting of a long grocery line or delayed flight, but the soul-stretching kind of waiting that touches the deepest desires of our hearts. The waiting for a spouse. The waiting for a child. The waiting for healing. The waiting for the right career opportunity. The waiting for restoration, clarity, breakthrough, or relief.

As Christians, we often know God can do it. The tension comes when He doesn’t do it in the timing we expected.

Waiting can quietly become exhausting. We smile in public while privately wrestling with disappointment, comparison, and questions we hesitate to say out loud. We wonder if we missed God. Did we pray incorrectly? Did our promise expire?

Scripture reminds us that waiting is not wasted. Isaiah 40:31 (NIV) says:

“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

Notice the verse does not say those who avoid waiting will renew their strength. It says those who hope in the Lord while they wait. God is deeply concerned not only with what we are waiting for, but who we are becoming while we wait. This is where long-suffering enters the conversation.

Galatians 5:22-23 (NKJV) says:

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”

Depending on the translation, “longsuffering” is also rendered as patience. It is the Spirit-produced ability to endure hardship, delay, discomfort, or unmet longing without abandoning faith. Long-suffering is not passive suffering; it is steadfast trust. It is choosing to remain tender when life makes you want to become cynical. It is worshipping while prayers remain unanswered. It is continuing to believe God is good even when your timeline looks nothing like you imagined.

Sometimes we become so focused on receiving the promise that we neglect our own spiritual and emotional wellness in the process. We stop resting. We stop enjoying life. We stop noticing God’s daily mercies because we are consumed by what has not yet arrived.

But being “well in the waiting” means refusing to let delay make us spiritually sick.

“I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.”

Psalm 27:13-14 (NIV)

Last weekend, instead of focusing on my season, I chose to sit in celebration of others. My sister, her oldest daughter, and younger daughter all graduated (Master of Criminal Justice, Bachelor of Education, High School Diploma). Familial prayers answered; what a reason to be grateful!

Waiting well does not mean pretending the desire no longer matters. It means surrendering the pressure to force outcomes and finding the beauty in what only God can orchestrate. The truth is, some of the holiest work God does happens in hidden seasons. In the waiting, He develops endurance, deepens intimacy, refines motives, and teaches us that His presence is not secondary to the promise; it is the promise.

If you find yourself in a season of waiting, do not allow frustration to harden your heart. Stay connected to God. Stay hopeful. Stay healthy spiritually. Let the Holy Spirit produce long-suffering in you that is rooted in trust, not mere survival.

Because eventually, the waiting season will end. And when it does, you want to arrive at the promise whole, healed, faith-full and with a glorious testimony.

May 17, 2026
Open Hands: Letting God Rewrite the Plan

Last Sunday, Dr. Chuck Swindoll visited our church and delivered a message that lingered long after the service ended. He spoke about something many of us know all too well…what it feels like when life doesn’t go according to plan. In those moments, our instinct is often to grip tighter, to hold on to what we thought should happen. But what if those disruptions aren’t detours at all? What if they are divine repositioning?

Sometimes we “white knuckle” our plans. We clench them tightly, convinced that if we just hold on hard enough, things will work out the way we envisioned. But Scripture gently challenges that mindset:

“The mind of a person plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.”

Proverbs 16:9, NASB 2020

Planning isn’t the problem. God invites wisdom and preparation. The tension comes when our plans become rigid, when our grip tightens instead of loosens in trust. Dr. Swindoll’s message reminded us that there are times when God, in His love, must pry our hands open. And let’s be honest, sometimes that process is uncomfortable, even painful.

But it is always purposeful.

Consider this:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”

Proverbs 3:5–6, NASB 2020

Walking by faith is not passive; it requires intentional surrender. It means we still make plans, but we present them to God with open palms instead of clenched fists. We acknowledge that His vision is greater, His timing is perfect, and His redirection is not rejection; it’s refinement.

When we remain open, we create space for God to move, not forcefully, but gracefully. What He replaces our plans with is often beyond what we could have imagined on our own:

“For I know the plans that I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans for prosperity and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

Jeremiah 29:11, NASB 2020

The challenge isn’t in making plans, it’s in surrendering them.

Take a moment today to reflect on something you may be holding too tightly. Write it down, pray over it, and consciously release it to God. Open your hands, and trust Him to place something better within them.

May 3, 2026
What Brings You Joy?

It’s a simple question, yet one that often gets buried beneath responsibilities, stress, and the constant noise of everyday life. In a world that feels increasingly heavy, taking a moment to reflect on what truly fills your heart is not just important, it’s necessary.

For me, joy has always been connected to music.

Growing up, I loved singing in choirs. There was something about blending voices, harmonizing with others, and becoming part of a sound bigger than myself that stirred something deep within me. Even now, that same passion remains. Singing is an experience. It’s physical. It’s emotional. It’s spiritual. There’s a release that happens in the body when you sing. Your breathing changes. Your posture shifts. Your entire being becomes engaged. It’s almost as if the weight you’ve been carrying finds an exit through every note. Science may explain parts of it, but for me, it feels like something sacred, like God designed it that way on purpose.

As powerful as that personal release is, it doesn’t compare to the joy I feel when our choir ministers to the congregation. There is nothing like watching the Holy Spirit shift the atmosphere—hearts softening, burdens lifting, eyes closing in surrender—as the music carries a message straight to the soul. Today’s selection, “All in His Hands,” felt especially timely. With so much going on in the world—uncertainty, challenges, and moments that try to shake our faith—we are reminded that everything rests in God’s hands.

And here’s the beautiful truth: sometimes the very gift God has given us to minister to others becomes the same gift that blesses us in return. Isn’t that just like God?!?! What He places inside of us isn’t just for outward expression; it’s also for inward renewal. When we operate in our God-given gifts, we don’t pour out and become empty; we pour out and somehow are filled at the same time.

The Bible reminds us in 1 Peter 4:10 (NIV): “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.”

Our gifts are meant to serve. They are meant to uplift, encourage, and point others back to Him. But God, in His goodness, doesn’t stop there. He allows that same act of service to minister right back to us.

Isaiah 61:3 (NIV) speaks of “a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.” That’s exactly what happens in those moments of worship through song. What may have started as heaviness is exchanged for joy. What felt overwhelming becomes surrendered. What felt uncertain becomes anchored in trust.

And then there’s Psalm 100:2 (NIV): “Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.” Joy isn’t just a byproduct of worship; it’s an invitation.

So, I ask you again: what brings you joy?

Maybe it’s singing. Maybe it’s writing, teaching, serving, encouraging, or simply being present for someone in need. Whatever it is, don’t overlook it. Don’t minimize it. That thing that stirs your heart could very well be the vessel God uses to bless others…and in the process, remind you of His presence, His peace, and His promises.

Because sometimes, the very thing you give away…
is the very thing God uses to restore you.

And that kind of joy?
It’s unmatched.

Click the image below. Join us for worship and the Word!

April 19, 2026
Chapter 47: Just Wanna Make it to Heaven

Yesterday, I turned 47. WHEW…that half a century coming in fast y’all! This year feels less like a milestone and more like a moment of alignment. Looking back, I can see how intentional this past year has been. Not perfect, certainly not without challenge, but purposeful. God has been gently, yet persistently, calling me deeper; deeper in faith, deeper in discipline, and deeper in obedience.

Spiritually, this has been a year of learning to truly walk with God, not just acknowledge Him. Proverbs 3:5–6 NIV reminds me, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” Submission has been the stretching place. It’s one thing to know His Word, but another to follow His voice when it requires surrendering comfort, control, or clarity. I am learning that obedience to the Holy Spirit is not about me having all the answers; it’s about trusting the One who does.

Health has also taken its rightful place as a priority, not just for today, but for the future I am stewarding. The body is not separate from my calling; it supports it. 1 Corinthians 6:19–20 NIV grounds me in this truth: “Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit… Therefore honor God with your bodies.” This year, honoring God has looked like choosing rest when needed, being more mindful of what I consume, and recognizing that longevity in purpose requires intentional care.

As a leader, I’ve grown in understanding that leadership is less about position and more about posture. It is about humility, consistency, and the willingness to be led by God first. James 1:5 NIV has been a steady anchor: “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God… and it will be given to you.” I’m leaning into that promise; seeking wisdom in decisions, in how I serve others, and in how I show up. Leadership is refined in the quiet places where character is built long before it is seen.

At 47, there is no arrival; I am still becoming. Becoming more attentive to God’s voice. Becoming more disciplined in my stewardship. Becoming more grounded in who He’s called me to be. And that is my posture moving forward: not striving, but surrendering…trusting that every step of obedience, every choice toward health, and every act of faithful leadership is part of the greater work He is completing in me.

Great, growth or groan, I’m ready for whatever comes next!

March 30, 2026
When Life Yo-Yo’s, Fix Your Eyes

I recently read a blog post called “Yo-Yoing” by Phyllis Kritek. I felt her quietly narrating my own life. She described the back-and-forth rhythm of trying to stay consistent, only to be pulled away by everything life keeps throwing in your direction. The tension between intention and reality…I feel it deeply.

Because if I’m honest, life has been lifing.

From grieving the loss of my great aunt around Thanksgiving to celebrating the birth of my newest great-nephew, my heart has been stretched in various directions; grieving and rejoicing, slowing down and showing up. And somewhere in between all of that, the things I want to do (like writing, reflecting, being consistent) feel harder to hold onto.

The blog put language to something I hadn’t fully admitted: sometimes it’s not a lack of discipline, it’s the weight of life transitions. There’s this subtle guilt that creeps in when you’re not producing or keeping up with your own expectations. But what if the pause isn’t failure? What if it’s simply evidence that you’re human, walking through real moments that matter?

Still, I’ve realized something in this season: while life may feel like a yo-yo…up and down, forward and back…my focus doesn’t have to be.

Scripture reminds us we should be continuously “fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith…” Hebrews 12:2 (NIV)

Not fix our eyes on our productivity.
Not fix our eyes on our consistency.
Not even fix our eyes on how well we’re “handling” life.

Fix them on Jesus.

Because He is steady when everything else isn’t.

I may not have written as much as I planned.
I may not have shown up in all the ways I intended.

But I’ve been present for the moments that mattered.
I’ve loved my family.
I’ve felt the weight of loss and the joy of new life.

And maybe, just maybe, that counts more than perfect consistency.

So, if you’re in a season where your rhythm feels off, where your goals keep getting interrupted, where life keeps “yo-yoing” you in unexpected directions… you’re not alone.

Give yourself grace.

And then gently, intentionally, lift your eyes again.

Because even when life is inconsistent—
He never is.

March 22, 2026
Across the Finish Line…

Happy belated new year! Pardon my absence for the past few months. It’s true what they say, the older you get, the quicker time passes by. This past fall, I finally completed my Doctor of Nursing Practice degree!

The idea of a doctorate lived in my prayers before it ever hit my résumé. The quiet nudge that demanded discipline, resilience, and more faith than I realized I had. There were seasons when progress felt slow, when I questioned whether I still had capacity, and when life didn’t pause just because of the added weight. Yet somehow, every chapter, every assignment, every late night carried purpose. The journey stretched me intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. Scripture reminds us, “The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me” (Psalm 138:8, ESV). Looking back, I see that God wasn’t just helping me earn a doctorate; He was shaping my leadership, refining my dependence, and aligning my work with His will.

Listening Closely to the Spirit

One of the most meaningful parts of this process was learning how to listen, not just to mentors, evidence, or systems, but to the Spirit. Purpose isn’t found in hustle; purpose is found in stillness. It’s discovered when we quiet the noise long enough to hear what God is already saying. Many times, we pursue the certainty of an outcome before obedience. I wanted the whole roadmap before taking the next step. Faith doesn’t work that way. Instead, God kept inviting me to move one decision at a time, trusting Him with what I could not see yet.

Proverbs says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5–6, NIV). The journey wasn’t just academic advancement; it was spiritual formation. I learned to pause before reacting, pray before planning, and ask God not for what I wanted, but instead for what He desired to grow through me. Listening to the Spirit changed how I approached leadership, scholarship, and even my own limits.

The Struggle of Full Surrender

If I’m being honest, surrender is a hard lesson. We like partial surrender. It’s the kind where God can guide, but we still need to control the outcome. Full surrender asks us to release timelines, expectations, comparison, and fear. Even now, there are moments when I have to lay down the fallacy of perfectionism, self-doubt, and the pressure to prove myself even if only to myself. I am learning that obedience is more powerful than striving. Rest is sometimes more productive than pushing.

Jesus says, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23, NIV). Following Christ isn’t always big and dramatic, sometimes it looks like staying committed when motivation fades, trusting when outcomes are unclear, and choosing faith when comfort would be easier. Surrender meant letting God define success…not just finishing strong but finishing faithful. Not just earning credentials, but becoming the kind of leader who reflects humility, courage, and compassion. Isaiah reminds us, “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you” (Isaiah 26:3, NLT). Peace comes not from knowing every answer, but from knowing who holds them.

…to Beyond

Now that this chapter is complete, what’s next? Only God knows! My certainty lies in knowing He purposed me to serve, to mentor, to influence, and to lead with integrity and grace. This degree represents both a milestone and a mission. “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work among you will complete it by the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6, NASB). God will always finish what He starts…in our careers, our families, our education, our businesses, our communities, our leadership, and our hearts. Cheers to moving forward with gratitude, humility, and expectancy. Listening more closely. Trusting more deeply. Surrendering more fully. Because the greatest reward isn’t the thing I achieved, it’s becoming the woman God was shaping all along the way.

c’est la vie RN

January 27, 2026
Living Wisely with Time

Have you noticed how time seems to move differently as we age? As a child, I felt like the days stretched on forever…a single summer seemed like endless cousin joy, and waiting for a birthday or Christmas was almost unbearable. But now, as an adult, I swear the weeks and months seem to fly by. Yesterday, I traveled back home to attend my godson’s gender reveal. I remember when he was born, and now he’s celebrating having a little one of his own.

I stopped to visit my uncle and great aunt. While they were always considered an elder in the family, it’s more evident the family elders are in their elderly phase of life. The neighborhood kids I remember from my young adulthood are now grown, with their own grown children! Now, one year fades into the next before we’ve even caught our breath. This shift is more than just perception. It’s a reminder from God that our days are fleeting, and we are called to use them with wisdom and care.

The psalmist captures this reality when he prays, “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12, NIV). In other words, we aren’t just to count the years that pass but to make the years—and the days within them—count. Every sunrise is an opportunity to live with intention, to love more deeply, and to grow more faithfully. If we aren’t mindful, we risk letting time pass while our hearts drift from what matters most.

Ephesians 5:15-16 (NLT) speaks directly to this truth: “So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days.” Life has many demands that compete for our attention…work deadlines, family responsibilities, financial pressures. Yet, in the midst of it all, God calls us to slow down and live wisely. That means investing our time in what nurtures our souls, strengthens our families, deepens our faith, and brings light to a world that desperately needs hope.

Time will continue to move quickly, and we cannot control its pace. But we can decide how we will walk through it. When our priorities are aligned with God’s, we discover peace even in the busyness. We can look back not with regret but with gratitude for a life lived intentionally.

Here’s a question for you to reflect on this week: pause and ask yourself—how am I spending my time? What needs more of my heart, and what is draining it unnecessarily? Choose today to live on purpose, to lean into God’s wisdom, and to let every moment reflect His love.

September 8, 2025