ç'est la vie RN

Tag: faith

When Life Yo-Yo’s, Fix Your Eyes

I recently read a blog post called “Yo-Yoing” by Phyllis Kritek. I felt her quietly narrating my own life. She described the back-and-forth rhythm of trying to stay consistent, only to be pulled away by everything life keeps throwing in your direction. The tension between intention and reality…I feel it deeply.

Because if I’m honest, life has been lifing.

From grieving the loss of my great aunt around Thanksgiving to celebrating the birth of my newest great-nephew, my heart has been stretched in various directions; grieving and rejoicing, slowing down and showing up. And somewhere in between all of that, the things I want to do (like writing, reflecting, being consistent) feel harder to hold onto.

The blog put language to something I hadn’t fully admitted: sometimes it’s not a lack of discipline, it’s the weight of life transitions. There’s this subtle guilt that creeps in when you’re not producing or keeping up with your own expectations. But what if the pause isn’t failure? What if it’s simply evidence that you’re human, walking through real moments that matter?

Still, I’ve realized something in this season: while life may feel like a yo-yo…up and down, forward and back…my focus doesn’t have to be.

Scripture reminds us we should be continuously “fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith…” Hebrews 12:2 (NIV)

Not fix our eyes on our productivity.
Not fix our eyes on our consistency.
Not even fix our eyes on how well we’re “handling” life.

Fix them on Jesus.

Because He is steady when everything else isn’t.

I may not have written as much as I planned.
I may not have shown up in all the ways I intended.

But I’ve been present for the moments that mattered.
I’ve loved my family.
I’ve felt the weight of loss and the joy of new life.

And maybe, just maybe, that counts more than perfect consistency.

So, if you’re in a season where your rhythm feels off, where your goals keep getting interrupted, where life keeps “yo-yoing” you in unexpected directions… you’re not alone.

Give yourself grace.

And then gently, intentionally, lift your eyes again.

Because even when life is inconsistent—
He never is.

March 22, 2026
Across the Finish Line…

Happy belated new year! Pardon my absence for the past few months. It’s true what they say, the older you get, the quicker time passes by. This past fall, I finally completed my Doctor of Nursing Practice degree!

The idea of a doctorate lived in my prayers before it ever hit my résumé. The quiet nudge that demanded discipline, resilience, and more faith than I realized I had. There were seasons when progress felt slow, when I questioned whether I still had capacity, and when life didn’t pause just because of the added weight. Yet somehow, every chapter, every assignment, every late night carried purpose. The journey stretched me intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. Scripture reminds us, “The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me” (Psalm 138:8, ESV). Looking back, I see that God wasn’t just helping me earn a doctorate; He was shaping my leadership, refining my dependence, and aligning my work with His will.

Listening Closely to the Spirit

One of the most meaningful parts of this process was learning how to listen, not just to mentors, evidence, or systems, but to the Spirit. Purpose isn’t found in hustle; purpose is found in stillness. It’s discovered when we quiet the noise long enough to hear what God is already saying. Many times, we pursue the certainty of an outcome before obedience. I wanted the whole roadmap before taking the next step. Faith doesn’t work that way. Instead, God kept inviting me to move one decision at a time, trusting Him with what I could not see yet.

Proverbs says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5–6, NIV). The journey wasn’t just academic advancement; it was spiritual formation. I learned to pause before reacting, pray before planning, and ask God not for what I wanted, but instead for what He desired to grow through me. Listening to the Spirit changed how I approached leadership, scholarship, and even my own limits.

The Struggle of Full Surrender

If I’m being honest, surrender is a hard lesson. We like partial surrender. It’s the kind where God can guide, but we still need to control the outcome. Full surrender asks us to release timelines, expectations, comparison, and fear. Even now, there are moments when I have to lay down the fallacy of perfectionism, self-doubt, and the pressure to prove myself even if only to myself. I am learning that obedience is more powerful than striving. Rest is sometimes more productive than pushing.

Jesus says, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23, NIV). Following Christ isn’t always big and dramatic, sometimes it looks like staying committed when motivation fades, trusting when outcomes are unclear, and choosing faith when comfort would be easier. Surrender meant letting God define success…not just finishing strong but finishing faithful. Not just earning credentials, but becoming the kind of leader who reflects humility, courage, and compassion. Isaiah reminds us, “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you” (Isaiah 26:3, NLT). Peace comes not from knowing every answer, but from knowing who holds them.

…to Beyond

Now that this chapter is complete, what’s next? Only God knows! My certainty lies in knowing He purposed me to serve, to mentor, to influence, and to lead with integrity and grace. This degree represents both a milestone and a mission. “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work among you will complete it by the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6, NASB). God will always finish what He starts…in our careers, our families, our education, our businesses, our communities, our leadership, and our hearts. Cheers to moving forward with gratitude, humility, and expectancy. Listening more closely. Trusting more deeply. Surrendering more fully. Because the greatest reward isn’t the thing I achieved, it’s becoming the woman God was shaping all along the way.

c’est la vie RN

January 27, 2026
Handcrafted by the Creator
Reflections from the Chihuly Garden & Glass Museum

Yesterday, my sister and I decided to take advantage of a beautifully sunny and cloudless fall day in Seattle. It was the first time I was able to visit the Chihuly Garden and Glass Museum. Walking through the museum is like stepping into a living kaleidoscope. Every curve of glass, every swirl of color, every beam of light refracted through a hand-blown vessel tells a story of creativity, patience, and purpose. As I stood beneath Dale Chihuly’s massive glass installations—delicate yet bold, fragile yet strong—I couldn’t help but think of how beautifully this mirrors God’s handiwork in us.

Each piece of glass begins formless and colorless, shaped by fire into something breathtaking. The glassblower’s breath gives it life and direction, much like God’s breath of life infused meaning and purpose into humanity (Genesis 2:7). No two pieces are identical, and even the tiny imperfections add to their beauty. Psalm 139:13-14 (NIV) also reminds us, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” In the studio, the artist must trust the process. High heat, turning pressure, and time allows the glass to reach its full brilliance. Isn’t that true for us as well? Life’s heat and pressure refine our character. They teach us patience, humility, and resilience. What may feel like breaking is often shaping.

Jesus reminded His followers in Luke 12:7 (NIV), “Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” That verse resonated deeply as I watched the glowing glass cool into perfection. God’s care for us is just as detailed, intentional, and loving. We are not mass-produced souls; we are one-of-a-kind masterpieces. Like the glass suspended in Chihuly’s galleries, we were designed to reflectlight, not our own, but the radiant light of Christ. Each of us refracts His glory in different colors, textures, and stories. The beauty of the kingdom is in its diversity of vessels, all made by the same Master Artist.

Call to Action

The next time you walk through a gallery, a garden, or even your daily routine, take a moment to marvel at the craftsmanship around you. Whisper a prayer of gratitude to the Creator who shaped you with intentional love. Then, let His light shine through you, reflecting grace, kindness, and purpose wherever you go.

Remember: You are God’s masterpiece, hand-blown by His own breath.
October 7, 2025
Living Wisely with Time

Have you noticed how time seems to move differently as we age? As a child, I felt like the days stretched on forever…a single summer seemed like endless cousin joy, and waiting for a birthday or Christmas was almost unbearable. But now, as an adult, I swear the weeks and months seem to fly by. Yesterday, I traveled back home to attend my godson’s gender reveal. I remember when he was born, and now he’s celebrating having a little one of his own.

I stopped to visit my uncle and great aunt. While they were always considered an elder in the family, it’s more evident the family elders are in their elderly phase of life. The neighborhood kids I remember from my young adulthood are now grown, with their own grown children! Now, one year fades into the next before we’ve even caught our breath. This shift is more than just perception. It’s a reminder from God that our days are fleeting, and we are called to use them with wisdom and care.

The psalmist captures this reality when he prays, “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12, NIV). In other words, we aren’t just to count the years that pass but to make the years—and the days within them—count. Every sunrise is an opportunity to live with intention, to love more deeply, and to grow more faithfully. If we aren’t mindful, we risk letting time pass while our hearts drift from what matters most.

Ephesians 5:15-16 (NLT) speaks directly to this truth: “So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days.” Life has many demands that compete for our attention…work deadlines, family responsibilities, financial pressures. Yet, in the midst of it all, God calls us to slow down and live wisely. That means investing our time in what nurtures our souls, strengthens our families, deepens our faith, and brings light to a world that desperately needs hope.

Time will continue to move quickly, and we cannot control its pace. But we can decide how we will walk through it. When our priorities are aligned with God’s, we discover peace even in the busyness. We can look back not with regret but with gratitude for a life lived intentionally.

Here’s a question for you to reflect on this week: pause and ask yourself—how am I spending my time? What needs more of my heart, and what is draining it unnecessarily? Choose today to live on purpose, to lean into God’s wisdom, and to let every moment reflect His love.

September 8, 2025
Fresh or Spoiled? Checking the Soil of the Heart

For the past three weeks, my refrigerator has not been cooling properly. At first, I didn’t think much of it. I placed food inside, trusting it would stay fresh, only to find it spoiled quicker than usual. What was meant to preserve and nourish had become a place of waste. The fridge sounded and looked like it was doing its job from the outside, but inside, it was no longer the right environment for keeping things good. I had a new fridge delivered yesterday. As I thought about this, God reminded me that our hearts can be the same way. We can look fine on the outside, but if the soil of our hearts is not right, what goes in may not remain fresh. God’s Word, His truth, and even His blessings can sit in a heart that is too distracted, too hardened, or too weary to let them grow. Instead of producing life, they become crowded out and wasted.

Jesus said, “But the seed falling on good soil refers to someone who hears the word and understands it. This is the one who produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown” (Matthew 13:23, NIV).

The condition of the soil matters. It determines whether the Word will take root or fade away.

Scripture urges us: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” (Proverbs 4:23, NIV). Just like I need to be intentional about keeping my refrigerator working properly so that what I consume doesn’t make me ill, I must also be intentional about tending the soil of my heart. What am I letting in? What am I feeding on—fear or faith, bitterness or forgiveness, noise or God’s still small voice? What is manifesting from it? When the soil is healthy, the fruit becomes undeniable. Paul reminds us, “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5:22–23, NIV). These fruits don’t grow because of striving; they grow because the heart is resting in the right environment. They are the result of an environment that is softened by prayer, nourished by Scripture, and watered by the Spirit.

So today, I invite you to pause and reflect: What is the soil of your heart like? Is it ready to receive the living Word of God? Or does it need some tending, some clearing away of clutter, some refreshing by His Spirit? Ask the Lord to prepare your heart so that His Word can grow deep roots. Invite Him to cultivate your soil, so that what comes out of your life is not spoiled or wasted, but fresh, nourishing, and filled with the fruit of His Spirit. May we each become good soil; ready to receive, ready to grow, and ready to bear fruit that blesses the world around us.

Prayer:
Lord, soften the soil of my heart. Remove what doesn’t belong and make me ready to receive Your Word with joy. Water me with Your Spirit, so that I may grow in love, peace, and faithfulness. Let my life bear fruit that reflects Your goodness and draws others to You. Amen.

August 24, 2025
When the Invisible Becomes Visible
Every spring, my friend Lisa and I visit the Dallas Arboretum. I found myself so enamored with the experience that I neglected to take photos. There is a sacred presence as you wander about the many paths. The air is light with the scent of new blooms. The towering magnolia trees make my heart smile with nostalgic thoughts of home. Sunlight dances on the surface of White Rock Lake. Tulips stretch upward like praise hands. Everything feels alive, purposeful, and in full declaration of the One who made it all.

Romans 1:20 says, “For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made…” As I walked through rows of vibrant flowers and magnificent trees, I was struck by how clearly God’s creativity, order, and majesty were on display. Nature doesn’t argue about God—it just reveals Him.

And then I wondered, “What would people say about me if my invisible attributes were clearly seen?”

If my thoughts, intentions, and character were laid bare like the petals of a spring bloom—would they reflect the One who made me? Would people sense grace, patience, and love? Or would they find worry, bitterness, or pride tucked beneath the surface?

Here’s the beautiful truth: Just as spring renews the earth, God is always ready to renew us. We aren’t stuck with the things we hide. The Holy Spirit works quietly but powerfully, reshaping our inner lives so that who we are in private begins to shine in public.

You don’t have to be perfect. But you can be intentional.
- Pause and notice God in creation.
- Let Him speak to your soul in quiet places.
- Ask Him to make your inner world as beautiful as the world He made outside.
If the trees can point to His glory, so can we.

Call to Action:

Take a quiet walk this week—at your local arboretum, a park, or even just around your neighborhood. As you notice creation, ask God to show you one invisible attribute He wants to grow in you. Write it down. Pray into it. Let that inner transformation begin today.

“Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” —Psalm 51:10
May 5, 2025
Reflection: Growing in Christ
Yesterday, was Resurrection Sunday. After church service, I spent some time reflecting on my walk with the Lord. Growing in my relationship with Christ has been a journey filled with grace, correction, love, and transformation. In my early walk—what they call “a babe in Christ”—I relied heavily on others to feed me spiritually. I was open to the warmth of His presence but had little understanding of His Word. My prayers were often simple and self-focused, like a child asking for what they want without fully grasping the love or authority of the One they were speaking to.

As I’ve grown, my hunger for deeper understanding has increased. I now recognize the importance of obedience, trust, and surrender. I’ve learned that following Christ is not just about feelings but about faith—walking even when I don’t feel Him, believing even when I don’t understand. I see more clearly the areas of my life where He is calling me higher—into holiness, humility, and genuine love for others.

Still, there is a long way to go. There are places in my heart that need refining, thoughts that need to be taken captive, and habits that must be surrendered. Living a righteous life is not about perfection, but about direction—constantly moving toward Christ, even when I stumble. His grace covers me, but His Spirit also empowers me to grow. The journey never truly ends.

All of this growth is only possible because of what Jesus did on the cross. I think back to being a little girl in church where they would sing songs like Jesus Paid it All, There is a Fountain, and my favorite hymn, Near the Cross. I now understand the gravity of salvation. He bore my sins, past and future, and gave me access to the Father. He didn’t die so I could live a good life—He died so I could live a new life. His resurrection power is what enables me to mature, to be transformed day by day into His image. The wonder of His love, proven through His sacrifice, draws me closer and inspires me to live a life that honors Him.

3 Simple Ways You Can Grow Closer to the Lord Today:
1. Talk to God Throughout Your Day
  Prayer doesn’t always have to be long or formal. Whisper to Him in your car, thank Him while cooking, or ask for guidance in a moment of stress. Make Him your constant companion.
2. Spend Time in the Word Daily
  Even if it’s just one chapter or a few verses, let God speak to your heart through Scripture. His Word is living and will guide your thoughts and actions.
3. Show Love Intentionally
  Look for simple ways to love others—through kindness, listening, encouraging words, or acts of service. Loving people well is one of the clearest signs of a deepening relationship with Christ.
April 21, 2025
Everlasting Life
Remembering Shelley Bailey

Yesterday morning I attended the memorial service of a formal colleague and friend. Every so often in life, you meet someone who truly has a beautiful soul. Shelley was one of those people. Her smile would light up a room. She consistently put the needs of others before her own. She was a loved wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, and friend to many. During the service, I became hyper aware of a number of things. First, who will write my obituary? How long will it be…my immediate family is massive? Maybe I should work on that myself right now. I mentioned it to my sister, and she told me she would not accept it before age 70. What would the vibe be? Would I want my body present or grave burial? All these random thoughts entered my mind as we celebrated Shelley’s life. I drew my attention back to the service and briefly settled into sadness because she is no longer physically present. However, it was short lived, as a level of palpable peace and hope arose in the building because of her faith in Jesus. Though her absence was deeply felt, there is comfort in knowing that she is now with the Lord.

The Bible assures us that those who believe in Jesus will have eternal life. John 11:25-26 (NASB) says, “Jesus said to her, ‘I am the resurrection and the life; the one who believes in Me will live, even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?’” Her faith in Christ means she is now in His presence, free from pain and sorrow. That is the real victory…accepting Jesus into our hearts that we may gain eternal life.

For those who want to accept Jesus as their Lord and Savior, here are simple steps:
1. Believe in Jesus – Trust that He is the Son of God and that He died for your sins. Romans 10:9 (NASB) says, “If you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.”
2. Repent of Your Sins – Turn away from sin and seek to follow God’s ways. Acts 3:19 (NASB) says, “Therefore repent and return, so that your sins may be wiped away.”
3. Pray and Invite Jesus into Your Heart – Talk to God, confess your faith in Him, and ask Him to lead your life.
4. Read the Bible and Pray Daily – Grow in your faith by spending time with God.
5. Find a Church Community – Surround yourself with believers who can encourage you.
Though our loved one is no longer here, her faith in Jesus assures us that we will see her again.
February 9, 2025
Martin Luther King Jr. Day: A Reflection
Although I was born post-Civil Rights Movement, I grew up with an awareness of Dr. King’s sacrifices and am inspired by his enduring legacy. Today we pause and reflect on the transformative vision of Dr. King—a man whose faith, courage, and love for humanity changed the course of history.

Dr. King’s work and message remain deeply relevant today. His fight for justice, equality, and unity calls us to examine our own hearts and actions. As Christians, we are reminded of Micah 6:8, which says: “He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” Dr. King embodied this mandate through his unwavering commitment to justice, his deep compassion, and his humble leadership.

Here are three things we should remember about Dr. King and his fight for humanity:
1. The Power of Love and Nonviolence
  Dr. King taught us that love is the most powerful force for change. Drawing from Jesus’ teachings in Matthew 5:44—“Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you”—he showed that nonviolent resistance could dismantle systems of hatred and oppression. His example challenges us to respond to injustice not with anger or bitterness but with love that transforms.
2. The Call to Unity
  Dr. King envisioned a world where the barriers of race, class, and prejudice would crumble, allowing people to live as equals. This vision reflects Galatians 3:28: “There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” As we honor his legacy, we must ask ourselves: Are we building bridges or walls in our relationships, communities, and nation?
3. Faith in Action
  Dr. King’s faith was not passive; it was bold and active, moving him to take risks for the sake of justice. James 2:26 reminds us: “Faith without works is dead.” Dr. King’s example encourages us to live out our faith in tangible ways, whether through speaking out against injustice, mentoring the next generation, or serving those in need.
As we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. Day, let us not merely remember his achievements but commit to carrying his torch forward. His fight for humanity calls us to examine our own roles in God’s plan for justice and reconciliation. We are called, as Dr. King once said, to be “a thermostat that transforms the mores of society,” not just a thermometer that passively reflects its conditions.

May his legacy inspire us to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with our God.
January 20, 2025
Never Would Have Made It

Do you ever feel like December just insists on snowballing itself into the new year? I finally made time this weekend to sit and reflect about the 4^th quarter and all the things. Never would have made it without you Lord! The sentiment resonates deeply with overcoming life’s trials through faith, perseverance, and the support of all my tribes. Whether it be in the nursing profession, ministry work, or in personal struggles, there are moments I realize that I didn’t make it on my own. “If the Lord had not been on our side…the flood would have engulfed us, the torrent would have swept over us” (Psalm 124:2,4).

These words are a reminder that every victory, every step forward, is evidence of God’s faithfulness! The truth is none of us could have made it alone. But through His grace, and often through the people He places around us, we stand as testimonies of His unfailing love and power. As we look back, we give thanks. We lean on the same God who brought us through. We never would have made it…but God! Giving God the glory after a hard time is not just about gratitude—it’s about acknowledging His sovereignty and His hand in the process. It’s saying, “God, I couldn’t have done this without You.” As 2 Corinthians 12:9 reminds us, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

After almost 8 months without a job…I never experienced homelessness or hunger. All the bills got paid. I was granted the opportunity to continue fellowship with friends, grow in the Spirit, get back to singing, and simply have joy in the valley. When we glorify God after a trial, we testify to His faithfulness and inspire others to trust Him in their own storms. He is trustworthy! Keep trusting and believing Him for whatever desires He has planted in your heart. In the end, I realized my struggle was about revealing His power and His glory through my life. To God be the glory, great things He has done!

December 16, 2024